Ike: Don't capitalize this title.
Me: But it's a proper noun and a title. And we've always capitalized it.
Ike: I know, but I want to call attention to the other title in the sentence, since it's more important. So capitalize that one but not this one.
Me: Capitalization doesn't work that way. And you can just reword the sentence if you want to stress one over the other, or join two phrases with a subordinating conjuntion to do it.
Ike: No one will understand that. This makes more sense, anyway.
Use of Adverbs:
Ike: You cannot end a sentence that way.
Me: Which way?
Ike: With "unanimously."
Me: What? Why?
Ike: You can't end a sentence with an adverb.
Me: Yes you can. You can end any sentence with an adverb. You're thinking of a preposition. And that's an old rule anyway.
Ike: I wasn't even talking about prepositions, but you can't end a sentence with those either. I'm talking about adverbs. You need to pay attention.
Me: Look, people end sentences with adverbs constantly.
Ike: Not correctly. And I don't want you doing it anymore*.
Use of the Past Perfect:
Ike: Why do you have all these "hads" in here?
Ike: Here and here and here.
Me: It's the past perfect.
Ike: That's ridiculous. No one even knows what that is.
Me: Sure they do. It signals to the reader that the text is referring to something that happened before.
Ike: But it's already in past tense.
Me: I know, but sometimes things happen before that and you need to refer to them.
Ike: Everyone understands it happens before because of the context. You don't need to use them.
Me: Actually, you do need to use them. That's why we have them. To make it less confusing.
Ike: It's just some way for writers to make themselves feel smarter.
Me: No, I'm pretty sure it's just grammar.
*the rest of the day, I walked around saying things like "I am going to print these files....quickly," and "I have to go to the bathroom...slowly." Yes, I am that petty.