A few months ago, in the car, where all pertinent conversation in our family takes place, Thing One and Thing Two had this exchange:
"I would like to see Eight-Finger Jon again so I can play with his dog," said Thing Two.
"You can't call him Eight-Finger Jon anymore," said Thing One.
"Because now he doesn't have eight fingers. He only has FIVE."
"So I can call him Five-Finger Jon?"
"Well, he has metal fingers now."
"I thought he had a hook."
"Mom," Thing One called up to the front seat, "does Jon have fingers or a hook?"
"I'm not sure. Maybe he has both."
"Well," said Thing Two, "we could call him 10-finger Jon if he has metal fingers."
"That's stupid," said Thing One. "Having 10 fingers is normal so why would you make a whole name out of it?"
"It is not normal to have 5 metal fingers and 5 normal fingers!"
"But no one can tell from the name it isn't normal."
This conversation lasted for approximately 7 more minutes, and resulted in much arguing, and no new nickname for Jon until I said "What about Bionic Jon?"
They loved this (a name Fort Awesome thought up a long time ago), with only Thing One adding "Well, I don't know how bionic he really is, but okay."
Somehow, I think Jon would have loved listening to this conversation.