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March 23, 2007



Oh, fuck. Y'know, having children really does bring you down to the lowest common denominator. You grow up being all smart, and go to the fancy MFA factory being all witty, and at the end of the day you walk around thinking, if not admitting, that "it really is like having your heart outside your body" (gag). It's so true. My situation with the ex is totally different, but I had something kind of similar happen with my oldest, who has been moody and tantrum-prone for a couple of weeks and finally just today broke down and confessed that the school who says the kid is doing just fine and doesn't need any help from an aide or tutor or anything has been MAKING A KINDERGARTENER WITH SENSORY INTEGRATION DYSFUNCTION DO MATH PROBLEMS OUTSIDE AT RECESS INSTEAD OF PLAYING. "I don't want to go back to school after the doctor," the kid sobbed, "I don't want to work outside because the light hurts my eyes and I still can't do the math and I never get to plaaaaaaaay..."
Oh, for christ's sake.
There is just no end. And you seem to be handling it in a much more mature fashion, if it makes you feel any better, because while I did the whole "of course we will fix this, if something is bothering you you just have to TELL me, give Mommy a hug" thing in front of the kid, I still called the school office and told them that if the vice principal didn't call me back about this TODAY I was going to come over there and bring his toupee home strapped to the hood of the minivan. Yes, really. Yes, literally.
It did kind of make me feel better, though. And that is why children (ideally) have mothers, and not just absentee dads with their heads up their arses or vice principals who don't even know their teachers are encouraging delayed children to break regs and skip playtime. Thing One is lucky she has you keeping an eye on things, because sometimes I wonder if anyone besides the mom even notices when they're hurting like that, much less cares or tries to fix it. If all else fails, whip out the crazy. When you've got nothing else to lose in a situation it can be very therapeutic, and sometimes it even works. Or at least makes for a good story.
Love your writing. Love. It.


TM, here is what I know. You're a miracle. Your kids are lucky to have you. Really.



You are the best Terrible in the whole world. There should be a law against people who try to adopt and don't pay their child support on time or in whole. Maybe there is....in OR where all things are fairer and more just.

Tragically Hip Single Mother

Heh, whip out the crazy.

My take on this has been blurted into the cell phone ad nauseum, but I'd just like to say a big fat WORD to the words of the ladies, above.


This really tugged at me. One of my stepsisters went through a similar situation (and is still going through it). Her ex split and left her with three kids...then remarried someone 20 years younger...and had a baby. And pulls the same kind of "It's all about me" crap. I feel for you AND your kids. Even though we don't know each other in 'real' life, you know I've been reading here awhile...and I have to say that nothing you've ever written about John--even when you were married to him--has made me think he's anything more than a totally self-absorbed d*ck. And as for that NP guy, be careful, babe. Because as Alana said, you're a miracle...and unless he's worthy of one of those, he doesn't deserve anything from you...safe or otherwise. And you know I'm usually not this judgmental in comments...but damn, girl, you deserve the BEST.

Friend Omega

"But while I wouldn't tolerate such behavior from my friends, the men I'm either romantically involved with, or were, somehow get carte fucking blanche."

You were men? You never told me.

Also... how upset am I that you never return my phone calls or emails, but you try to pick back up on your pre-relationship relationship with NP?

Terrible Mother

See, my not calling you back is just me protecting myself from having to hear about all your screenwriting success. Which always makes me have to say sad things like "when you're famous, you'll take me to a big Hollywood party, right?"

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